Maude and I met Chad for breakfast this morning: Eggs Benedict in Gosforth seemed a very civilised way to start the week. Chad was as effusive and entertaining as ever – as he and Maude traded stories of teaching difficult young people under difficult management.
Anyone related
to a teacher will know that a gathering of teachers brings about a detailed discussion of modern teaching: poor
managers, excessive workload, government meddling etc. The quorum for this to
occur is a mere two. I usually try and change the subject and bring
teachers back into the non-teaching world. It’s easier during the holidays:
their ire is not quite so intense. Today, I managed to get Chad onto the
subject of social media. Chad shared my horror of people whose status updates
reveal/share too much or make childlike observations.
We quoted a
few examples to each other and agreed that one could be forgiven for thinking that
the status updaters concerned had forgotten to take their medication.
‘I think it’s
that they’ve generated their own mini stardom‘, observed Chad, ‘and those
idiots who ‘like’ their every observation on ‘how cute chipmunks are’ cheerlead them into thinking they are funny
and relevant.’.
I nodded
agreement. Chad went on.
‘They’ve
deluded themselves into thinking that their every thought has an import that
has to be shared, when, in fact, it’s…….it’s….’
‘Giddy
nonsense?’ I suggested.
‘…a load of
shit,’ concluded Chad.
I agreed that
he had a point and people should stop ‘fluffing’ inane updaters with the
stimulus of a ‘like’ or a supportive comment.
‘There should
be another button - next to the ‘Like’ button. An alternative.’
‘What?’ asked
Chad, ‘a ‘dislike’ button. What are you – some kind of joy-sapping troll?’ Chad
guffawed.
‘No. Nothing
as negative as that. Something
supportive. A small medicine bottle, or perhaps a pharmacy sign. Hitting it
would send a private suggestion that the fully grown adult who feels the need
to share their love of chipmunks should consider taking some calming
medication.’