‘You didn’t come back this week!’ said my neighbour, Vanessa, as we queued for coffee in the church hall.
I didn’t feel the need to tell
her that my confidence had been knocked a little by the frosty reception I
received on my first visit to ‘Rhymetime’. Magnus the librarian was thoroughly
welcoming and happily wrote a sticky name label for Jocasta to wear.
Some of the mothers, however, seemed
perturbed by the presence of a stay at home Dad. They all seemed to know each
other and were clearly such regular attenders that Magnus had pre-prepared
badges for their children.
I threw myself into proceedings,
nonetheless, and sang the rhymes with gusto.
It was halfway through ‘Incey
Wincey Spider’ that I thought I caught some non-verbal communication occurring
between two of the mothers. Some kind of signal passed between them involving a
nod towards me. Both women had younger babies – as well as their
Sofia/Sophias. They began to unbutton their cheesecloth blouses and, each with
a steely eye on me, started breast-feeding.
I was
not put off by this nursing offensive. I carried on singing and making spider
hands.
It was at this point that Magnus announced the banana break. His assistant
emerged
with a platter of sliced fruit.
The
nursing mothers whispered to their Sophia/Sofias that they should hurry and
get some fruit as a reward for all their wonderful singing. I wasted no time
whispering and shoved Jocasta in the general direction of the fruit.
‘Nana!’
cried my youngest. As she motored towards the platter, she inadvertently winged
a Sophia/Sofia and sent her into a bean bag.
I heard at least one gasp from the
Sophia/Sofia side of the room and smiled in the general direction of the mothers.
Mother one reciprocated with an incey wincey smile. Mother two looked
past me and switched breasts.
Oh Lord, you deserve a medal for bravery. That reminds me of some gladly not to be repeated episodes of trying not to let my awkwardness show when in a coven - er, I mean, a parent-toddler group. Carry on though - they'll get used to you.
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